count down to goal

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

my scale only knows two numbers

169.8

i found it hard to believe considering that i normally fluctuate and today was exactly the same as yesterday. the past several days were all the same, too: 172.0.

what-fucking-ever.

i'm having a little no-carb exchange experiment (fruit & veg are in, potatoes, grains, etc. are out) and it's going okaaaaaaaaay. maybe i need to not binge on carbs and sweets over the weekend?

i love my weight right now-- down almost seventy pounds!-- but hate my body. like... why do i have GIANT upper arms? why are my thighs so SOFT? what's up with the over-the-navel pouch? i'm beginning to panic that i might need to lose 50 more pounds to take off the last layers of fat so my skin can shrink. i read somewhere that if you lose a lot of weight, you'll need to have a much lower body fat percentage than normal to look normal. super. i'm trying to focus, though, on geting to 165 (then 145, then 135). little steps.

my husband last night as i sat, feet flat on the bed, knees bent 90*, said: "your legs are so... little." and then he giggled like a little girl.

1 comment:

supple mama said...

yes! I feel everything you wrote here. this will pass, we'll both make it to goal weight!