what i REALLY wanted

usually i have 1/2 a whole grain english muffin, 1 egg + 1 white (scrambled), skim milk and 1/2 tbs butter (split between the egg pan and the muffin) for breakfast. at which point i am FULL. but this morning, my ass was dragging from an emotionally exhausting 14-hour day, and i just asked my husband to toast me 1/2 an english muffin planning to eat a 0% yogurt at work.

well, as i wandered into the kitchen to butter up my muffin, i had a flash of inspiration. i put some all-natural peanut butter (with the oil poured off when i bought the jar) on it. i took a bite. amazing. just then, my husband asked if i minded if he took some of my uncle sam's fiber cereal for snack since we ran out of fruit (um, that is, he only got to pack 2 servings today instead of 3). "oooooh," i said, "you should totally put some chocolate chips in that."

and then i looked at my peanut-buttered english muffin half with one bite taken out.

and i added 8 semisweet chocolate chips to it.

and it was the single most satisfying breakfast i've ever had.

i'm really making an effort to eat what i REALLY want lately. it helps me prevent a binge. see, like if i ate my usual breakfast, i'd be stuffed, but i'd want a piece of candy with my coffee at work an hour later. sometimes my yogurt-n-uncle sam's does it for me for lunch, sometimes i really want a chicken caesar salad. sometimes a cup of jersey blues thrills me at 3, and other times it really needs to be a veggie egg roll. but if i eat that breakfast, that lunch or that snack? i may still get the other thing. or i may try to satisfy myself with another (additional) food that doesn't do it, and another, and another, and next think i know: ben & jerry's and lay's originals.

so, i'll put 8 chocolate chips on my english muffin. where's the harm?